Round 1 --- FIGHT!

I had a conflict with a friend whom I shall name Mr A. This incident happened when I was serving my liability in the army. The working environment was such that work was never ending and emotions were usually running high in the office. It happened on this fateful day when nothing seems to be going right and everything seems to be occurring simultaneously, resulting in a huge load of work to do.  Tempers were short and the office had landmines planted everywhere. Naturally I had stepped on Mr A’s to result in an explosion of emotions leading to a quarrel. The quarrel transcended rather quickly to violence when Mr A decided to throw pens at me. I took myself away from the conflict by walking out of the office. We made up at the end of the day’s work and we are still friends now.

The main problem could be my lack of tactfulness, which resulted in the stepping on my friend’s toes hence causing the outburst. If I had not agitated him, probably this would not have happened. Additionally, the stress at work and the rush to meet datelines could have also contributed to the outburst.

There was much frustrations in the office on that day. I could have been an outlet for Mr A to release his frustrations. I, on the other hand, was rather calm and level-headed in the midst of our quarrel. I was fully conscious that I should not return blows, otherwise things would have gotten uglier.

Is walking away the best option? How else could I have handled such situations should they happen again? 

I want to be an effective communciator

I would generalize to broadly categorize communications under 2 headings, written and oral communications. I feel that written communications might not be as major of a problem to me since drafts can be written and redrafted and re-edited before sending it out. A written communication can be well thought out. While oral communication has a much shorter thinking processing time. You may probably pause for 5 seconds before making yourself look really rude for not answering a question directed at you. Yet should the reply be insufficient, then this communication channel would have broken down since the idea was not communicated effectively.

Communicating is the very basis of a face-to-face interaction with other people. This activity takes place on a daily basis, hence I feel it is important to improve my skills to better interact with people. There are times when I feel lost for words that I do not know how to continue interacting and there was the awkward silence. It may sound easy to simply ‘talk to people’ but there are in fact many underlying skills involved, such as to find the right topics so that the conversation will go on.

I also feel that being able to communication well is very important in making one’s first impression on others, besides one’s appearance.  Other than just looking good, being able to interact proficiently will portray your intelligence, hence would definitely improve others’ impression of you. This is probably the area which I am lacking. I have failed to secure scholarships due to my poor performance during interviews. I am unable to communicate effectively enough to show that I am in fact rather intelligent.

Being an effective communicator allows me to steer a conversation to my favor in any occasion. It would probably help me in making more friends too!?